Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
