There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
