problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
