You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
