I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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