If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Randomize
