I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
