is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
