well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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