i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
