I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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