did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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