Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize