Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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