I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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