I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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