your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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