think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize
