some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I got her a Nickelback box set.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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