Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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