hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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