none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
