Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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