Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
