i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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