Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
