I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I just want to make out with him forever
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Randomize
