I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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