She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
