Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
