two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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