If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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