I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Randomize
