Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
