@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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