Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
