Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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