I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
the day after is always just damage control
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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