just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
