Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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