i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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