he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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