..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize