all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
