So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
