if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
