the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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