Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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