i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
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