I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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